Obama Orders Re-invasion Of Iraq After Illuminating Trip Through Bush Presidential Library

News from the Onion

All Of Nation's Living Presidents Gather To Lie About Bush Presidency
A study finds that wolf attacks are still the leading cause of death in America, a man says 'fuck it' and eats lunch and 10:58 a.m., and Dzhokar Tsarnaev posts bail.

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If you sit by a river long enough, you'll see the body of your enemy float by.
Old Japanese proverb